Come Along With Me

...on a little guilt trip.

While I hate being guilted into doing things, I do have to agree it might be time for an update. I have to tell you though, it's tough to be motivated to post when very little changes.

I have been knitting, but I can't really show you. (I can't even tell you what a hindrance that is to posting.) As you can tell, I'm not the only one entranced by a shiny new stitch marker.

Others of us don't seem to care.

I've been taking some walks with some friends. Well, near some friends.

I've been taking pictures of weeping willow trees for my mom. (Hi, Mom!)

I got a sweet birthday gift from my friend Leone... more sock yarn! I really need to start finishing some socks.

Oh. I, umm, finished a sock. (I can show you this one, because the recipient already knows about them. The second one is already halfway down the cuff.)

I owed you a birthday party pic. Here you go. Standing (from left): John, Ed, and Thomas. On the couch (from left): Aunt Karyl Lyn, Wendy, Linda, Tobie, Nicole, and me. In the front: Kimmie.

Today is Dad's birthday. I mixed my corn with my mashed potatoes at dinner to honor him.

What In The World...

...have I been doing?

Working

I know, I'm sorry. You weren't sitting down when you read that? I should have warned you. I'll try to do better next time.

I finally picked up a temp assignment from my new favorite temp agency: Express Personnel. There's an office less than a mile from my apartment and they found me an assignment about 15 minutes away. I'm working for the United Way doing administrative tasks. It's a part-time temp job, for about 28 hours a week, but it's something.

I started working there on Wednesday, October 11, and taught two of the ladies in the office to knit at lunch on Friday, October 13. I was pretty impressed with that turnaround.

I've also picked up some hours at the yarn store. I worked during the day on Tuesday, October 12, and also worked Saturday, October 14, after sock club. I had four participants this time including one brand new sock knitter who actually taught herself how to start the sock by reading a book. She said it took her a couple of tries, but she had those double pointed needles going like a pro by the time she came to sock club. I showed her how to turn the heel and decrease for the gusset, and she was off and running again. Very impressive.

Saturday afternoon I worked with a lady named Dani, helping a few customers and rearranging some of the yarns to make the store more bee-you-tiful. We picked on each other back and forth throughout the afternoon, as we are wont to do, and after laughing our way through most of the afternoon, I told her, "It's a good thing you like me, or I could be in trouble."

She just shook her head and smiled. "You're like the monkey in my brain," she said. She couldn't have paid me a higher compliment.

Knitting

I know! Can you believe it?

I'm thinking about writing a letter to the DPN manufacturers of the world, asking them to stop making US size 2 dpns. The more of them they make, the more socks I can cast on withouth finishing old pairs. Seriously. I give you:

The yarn is called Pace from Universal Yarn, Inc. I love this barely-tweedy orange. The pattern is made up from the railroad rib stitch I found in both a sock pattern at the store and also in Sensational Knitted Socks. I keep hoarding that book from the library because it hasn't yet found it's way into my knitting library. I'm selfishly knitting these socks for myself. We'll see when the second one gets cast on.

I also made these mittens using a double strand of Artyarns luxury ultramerino sock yarn (same brand as the blue/brown colorway I got at the Wool Gathering). The mittens are about five inches long tip to tail, and I'm not sure if they're big enough to fit my niece. If they are, they're hers. If not, I may have to find another mini-diva to bestow them on.

I started another sock with a purple-y Trekking colorway, and I'm trying an entrelac pattern with it. The first one isn't really far enough along to get a good picture, but for the idea, see Eunny's blog. I'm excited because I think the Trekking will make an AMAZING entrelac, and I'm even more excited because my buddy Nicole taught me how to knit BACKWARDS so I don't have to flip the sock around every seven stitches. How sweet is that? Wanna know how? Leave a comment and maybe I'll do a step-by-step one of these days.

There's been (and not been) other knitting as well. Steady progress on the Pomatomos socks (with the exception of the five rows I currently need to rip back because I got cocky and stopped looking at the chart), absolutely no progress on the new entrelac bag, and I haven't started my nephew's birthday sweater yet because I still don't know how big to make it. This makes me sad, but as I told my mom earlier tonight, I may just go ahead and start it in a size 2T, so he'll be able to wear it for a really long time, or at least until December.

"Reading"

Ever since I bought a new vehicle back in May, I've been listening to books on tape and CD when I drive. Occasionally I'll switch to the radio or a music CD, but mostly it's been stories. I can't actually call it "reading" because it's actually "listening". However, the latest book is one I highly recommend. It's been out for a few years, but I finally decided I'd try it, and I can't get enough of it.

It takes up 16 CDs. 16. That's a lot of CDs. Most of the other books I've picked up with that many CDs have bored me to tears and I haven't been able to listen to the whole thing. Tonight I finished disk 15 and I'm desperately sad that there's only one more CD to go. I've already convinced myself I need to buy the actual book so that I can digest it more as I truly read it. It's an amazing story.

The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger is heartwrenching. If it's science fiction, it's the most emotional science fiction ever written. If it's a love story, it's the saddest love story ever written. If it's a tragedy, it's the happiest tragedy ever written. Once you accept that Henry is a time traveler, it couldn't make more sense.

It probably doesn't hurt that I have a little crush on the man who reads Henry's chapters. However, if you long for an emotionally charged story, this book is for you. If you've read it or are inspired to read it, I'd love to hear from you. Let me know what you think. I almost want to put off listening to the final CD to prolong the enjoyment.

Happy Blogi-Birthda-Versary!

Today we celebrate two pretty significant milestones:
Drunken Monkey Knits is celebrating its FIRST birthday!
And the Drunken Monkey is celebrating her 30th birthday!
I say that's cause for much drunken monkey-like jubilee.

This year I've had probably the longest birthday celebration ever, and it's not quite over yet. I include here, for your pleasure, some of the highlights.

September 17: Kimmie treats me to a wonderful, wool-filled day in Yellow Springs at the Wool Gathering.

September 27: Nicole and Tobie treat me to a delicious dinner at Bravo in West Chester.

September 28: Joy treats me to a delightful dinner at both Red Robin and her new home in Mason. (The rainbow pictured above stretched in a full arc across the sky and greeted us brilliantly as we left the restaurant.)

September 30: Wendy treats me to a super fun afternoon at her house, followed by a SHOCKING surprise party at Nicole's house, planned and attended by my incredible, industrious mother, and including my aunt, many of my close friends from my former place of employment (FPOE) and lots of my closest knitting groupies.
October 2: Tricia treats me to lunch and playland-playing at McDonalds with her three kids (twins almost 3, and one almost a year and a half), followed by shopping at Goodwill.

October 3: Leslie, Kimmie, and a few other friends from my FPOE treat me to a scrumptious lunch and dessert at Chili's in Montgomery. Then, after five hours of playing nanny for Tricia's kids, she and her husband treat me to a yummy Italian dinner with a canoli for dessert.

October 4: Potential lunch with even more friends from my FPOE.

October 6-8: The celebration continues with in Wooster with the party I knew about including family and maybe a couple of family friends.

I am truly and amazingly blessed. It's fun to be 30. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

My mom snapped a ton of pictures at the surprise birthday party. I'll copy them from her this weekend and share them with you soon. Thanks to everyone who has made this birthday absolutely amazing!

Wool You Be My Neighbor?

Do you see the person in the above picture? No no no... not me (the tall one), but the other one. Yes. That's Kimmie. And she is potentially definitely one of the most sweetest, generousest, kindest, wonderfulest people that I know.

Last Sunday, Kimmie and I went to the Wool Gathering in Yellow Springs, Ohio. This event is comparable to the Great Lakes Fiber Show that Kimmie, Nicole, and I had attended this past Memorial Day weekend. This one was a smidge smaller than the other show, but this one took place at Young's Jersey Dairy, a popular hangout from when I was in college. So not only did we get scrumptious fibery goodness, we also got ice cream. Could a day get any better?

It could indeed. Let me back up a bit. Kimmie picked me up Sunday morning, and when I went to get in her car, there was a little gift bag on the seat. It was an early birthday present from Kimmie! I opened it to find a (creative, ATKIM-automated teller Kimmie) gift certificate to the Wool Gathering so that I could get something that I wanted while I was there. How cool is that? And then she told me that if there was a star on the back of the gift certificate, it was good for a free lunch. Shockingly enough, I had a star on the back of my certificate! Score!

When we got to Yellow Springs, we did a pretty good job of going through most of the vendors before making any decisions. I did buy some 100% silk pretty early on, but for $2 per 100 yard skein, it was pretty tough to leave there. Oooooh... shiny.

(If you were a fiber lover, and you were in the middle of interviewing for your dream editing job, would this sign offend you? Yeah, me too.)

We wandered around a bit more and found a sheepdog demonstration. I was pretty impressed watching this dog crouch behind the sheep, watching to make sure they stayed in a group.

He had to run around them a couple times to make sure all the sheep stayed in line, until he finally got those little woolies over the bridge...

And into the pool. I love the smell of wet wool in the afternoon, don't you?

At the Yarns & Fabrications booth, you could Kool-Ade dye a skein of yarn for only $5, and Kimmie treated so we could both dye some yarn. Hers turned out to be a pretty red/orange color, and mine is the butterfly vomit delightful variegated in this picture.

I liked it better when I got it home and dry and all balled up, because I remembered this lime green Kool-aid dyed yarn I'd bought at the fiber festival in Wooster. Don't they go together well? I think I'll use the two together for something. I haven't decided what yet. I could felt them, too.

There's a new shop opening soon in Shreve, Ohio, which is near where my mom lives, and also happens to be where I went to elementary school. We first met the owner back in May, and we saw her again in Yellow Springs. Her shop carries some really interesting Japanese yarns, and I had to try one out. This one is a 100% cotton yarn, sort of eye-lashy, and I think that all wrapped up it looks like a haystack.

Kimmie, however, convinced me that it looks sort of like coconut. I remembered I had some fingering weight chocolate brown yarn at home, and I've decided to combine the two yarns, probably for a baby hat. It will look like a Crohn's Medicine hat!

I also got some really cute buttons for a really cute baby sweater that I'll soon be starting for a really cute baby's birthday at the end of November. But I can't show you those. Not yet anyway.

My favoritest, most happiest, gorgeousest, most beautifulest purchase, though, was this sock yarn from Artyarns. It's their Ultramerino sock yarn in potentially definitely the prettiest sock yarn color combination I've ever seen. This will definitely be socks for your very own drunken monkey, I just have to find the perfect pattern. (Oh, and finish those other dozen SWPs I have hanging around.)

Mmm, seriously.

All in all it was a very fun day with a very fun friend. We got to see Lisa and Wendy (hi Wendy!) and Nicole (hi Nicole!) while we were there, we had a great lunch with some screaming children and crazy old people at the Golden Jersey Inn, and we even got to listen to some quality music in the car. Hehe. Thanks again, Kimmie, for your generosity and fiber-excitement... both of which made the Wool Gathering an even greater experience. You're the best!!

Two Pair Down, A Million To Go

Remember this? I have recovered somewhat and two of those pairs of socks can no longer claim monkey-on-my-back status. Behold:

The yarn is Trekking colorway 100, and the pattern is Toe Jazz from Fiber Trends, with a flat toe instead of a split toe to wear them with flip-flops. Brenda, you'll notice that these socks are in no way identical. I think Trekking does that on purpose.

The yarn is Lana Grossa and I can't remember the colorway. The pattern is from Sensational Socks, but I don't remember which one because I had to return the book to the library ages ago. Brenda, you'll notice that these socks are almost identical. At least in this post I'm only halfway neurotic. Right?

Both pairs were gifted this afternoon at lunch to two of my goodest friends from my former place of employment. Both Kimmie and Leslie have been incredibly supportive to me, not just while I worked there, but especially after I was let go. So to both of you, thanks again for everything.

So what should I start now? (Don't you DARE answer that! I know you know how many works-in-progress I already have! Shame on you for even thinking about something new! Or wait... shame on me!)

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A few comments about the comments:

* Joy, fingerless mittens are for people like me who don't have any dexterity while wearing mittens, can't stand to have their fingers trapped in gloves, yet still want to keep their hands somewhat warm in the winter. It's okay if you don't get it.

* GraceGirl, I think you've got something there. Sounds to me like you've thought about it enough that you could do a thesis on the monkey v. tiger argument. I'll always vote monkey. You can use me in your bibliography.

* A long time ago I said something about a prize for the 500th comment. That's still true. This is the last time I'm going to mention it until it happens. We're within 100 comments.

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The birthday sweater was a success. Thanks for posting the pictures, Morgan! Go check out her blog for more photos from the 4th birthday.

When I was little, I had an aunt who would send a little something for me on Sean's birthday, and a little something for Sean on my birthday. So the little guy in Washington got a knitted ball to play with while he watches big sister ride her new bike. Good times.

FOs and Fair Findings

Be honest. How many of you didn't think I'd actually finish that felted striped tote? Go ahead. Raise your hand. I know there isn't always a lot of faith in me to finish projects. However, this was one thing I just couldn't put down. I finished it last week and this past Friday evening I felted it at my mom's house.

All the naysayers were right, the Noro (striped part) felted slower than the Lamb's Pride (solid black and solid red), and the felted Noro is sort of flimsy, but I think it will work out just fine since the heavier fabric makes up the bottom and will help to strengthen the top and handles. The Noro is SO much softer after it's been felted. I think it turned out great.

Lest I disappoint you, though, I did start two other projects before finishing the bag.

I started a pair of Fetching fingerless gloves and actually finished the left one. I'm using Rowan Calmer in the coffee shade, and I had to make a few alterations in order to fit my big paw. It's not quite a perfect fit, but I like it anyway and I'll make the right to match.

The other project I started is another Shedir, another Knitty pattern. Click the link to see the first one I made this past Spring. The new one is in black, and I've just gotten to the first cable row. Not really enough to take a picture of yet.

I was in Wooster again this weekend for the Wayne County Fair, which boasts itself as the largest junior fair in Ohio. I know it's the best one I've been to in the state. The most important feature, of course, is Pat's Italian Sausage Sandwiches, and a close second is the fried cheese-on-a-stick booth. I found some other goodies this year, too.

I found an alpaca booth! How cool is that? LongHedges Estate established itself in Wayne County about six months ago, and had some really great items in their booth. I was tempted to take home some gorgeous alpaca yarn, but somehow avoided the urge. I did get a cool brochure and a pen! Wooooo!

I also found a young lady (maybe 16 or 17) knitting dishcloths in one of the industrial buildings. She was selling her dishcloths for $2 a piece and she got to keep the profit. I couldn't deny supporting a dishcloth knitter, especially one who would knit at the fair, so both my aunt and I picked out our favorites. This is mine.

I found a cute sleeping piggy with his tongue sticking out. Aww.

I found some cute Jacob Sheep that wouldn't look at me. I think they may have been talking about me.

I found some gorgeous sunflowers that almost looked like a negative image. I couldn't believe what a deep rich color they were.

I found a lap-size log cabin quilt made with what seemed to be neck-tie fabrics. How cool! I wish I could have gotten a better picture of it but it was too far away.

Lastly, I found a really cute monkey hand puppet for only $4. Aww! She's so cute. Hey! Who's that up in the corner? OH... it's Stubby*. He's been crushing on the monkey ever since I brought her home.

This morning I caught them in a strange giraffe/ monkey embrace. Bet you don't see that too often.

*Stubby is a giraffe hand puppet that I bought for my dad when I was in college. He is so named because, well, he has no neck. I thought the identifying feature of giraffes was a very long neck. Stubby, appropriately, has no neck. He is also only one of a number of stuffed giraffes that my dad collected or was given over the years, and I would have to say there were at least a few more of them with no necks. I often have wondered... if there were a battle between long-necked giraffes and no-necked giraffes, who would win?

New Project

Hmm, that bag is moving along very nicely, I think I'll start something new.

Oh! I have an idea... what about that little catnip mouse kit I got at TNNA?

That does sound fun. Let's see, I'll have to find it.

Here's the bag it was in...

And I found the box...

Ooh, here are the directions, gonna need those...

The bag of catnip: the essential ingredient.

Last but not least, the yarn! I'm all set.









I think I'll post this now so I can get started! I just know the cats will really enjoy this catnip mouse!

I Do Not Like Plain Stockinette

I do not like plain stockinette
I really don't and won't knit it

I've said it once, I've said it twice
Plain stockinette is just not nice

I would not like to knit it here
I would not knit it anywhere

I would not knit it for a goat
I would not knit it on a boat

You like to do it, this I see
But I will not, it's not for me

I would not like to knit a square
I would not knit one on a dare

I would not knit a simple box
I will not knit your plain old socks

I would not, could not knit a bag
It's such a bore, it's such a drag

I do not like plain stockinette!
I really don't and won't knit it!

"Try it! Try it!" so you say
"Try it and you may," you say

Fine. I'll try this felted bag
I can't believe you're such a nag

I cast on and then start to knit
Oh well, I guess I'll knit a bit

Wait, this bag is pretty neat
To finish will be quite a feat

This pattern just goes on and on
I've knit two balls of Kureyon

And half a skein of black Lamb's Pride
This stockinette is on my side!

'Round and 'round and 'round and 'round
And 'round and 'round and 'round and 'round

I love I love this stockinette!
I do love it! I will knit it!

Knit round and round all day and night
Until this bag is outta sight!















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pattern: Felted Striped Tote from One Skein
yarn: black Lamb's Pride worsted, Noro Kureyon in Black/White colorway
needles: US 10.5 29" circular

They Just Keep Getting Bigger

Lest you think that all I've been good for this summer is neglecting socks, I want to present you with a super-secret object (outfit, even), that was completed about two weeks ago. Why did I keep said project from my most faithful blog readers? It was a surprise birthday present for my most precious niece, Maggie. (For evidence of said preciousness, go watch her feed her brother. Then come back. I'll wait.)

I've told the story many times about how I learned to knit and how the timing corresponded quite well with finding out that I was about to become an aunt. Talk about inspiration. Since then I've prided myself on providing my niece with a birthday sweater to mark each year of her life.

The first sweater I made for Maggie was a celebration of her birth day, and was sized for her at three months old. Her mom chose the Rosebud Cardigan from Simple Knits for Cherished Babies, a sweet raglan cardigan that was my very first sweater ever. I made it with a light gold-ish colored mercerized cotton... I don't even remember what the brand was. I'm pretty sure I got it from Patternworks. (Sorry about the lack of photo quality... this is a picture of a picture, and it's actually the best one I had.)

For Maggie's first birthday, I pieced together a design by looking at the patterns I had and combining my favorite elements. I might dare to call this my first actual original pattern. I used the now-discontinued Lily Sugar Babies (100% cotton) in a pale pink with white accents. You can barely see in this picture the big white M on the front of the sweater and the double white stripes on all the cuffs, around the arms, and around the hood.

Maggie's second birthday sweater has made its way around the world on knitty.com and can also be seen in the sidebar of this blog. It's another original pattern and I used Paton's Grace mercerized cotton to make it. (Mercerized cotton and other cottons make great baby sweaters. Soft and super easy to clean, I'll likely be using them for a while.)

The third birthday sweater was the Accordion pattern from Knitty. I made it with KnitPicks Shine (more cotton) in green, pink and cream. This was my first attempt at putting a zipper in a knitted object, and it turned out okay, even though it was a little uneven at the bottom. The only original thing about this one was the color choice.

This year, however, I went back to the drawing board and came up with another original design. I'm hoping for some modeled pictures soon, since the hanger I took pictures on is awfully wide and made the shoulders seem awfully wide, too. I started with Flash from Cascade Elite Yarns in the Thistle shade and size 5 needles. I know this will shock you, but it's 100% mercerized cotton. I was more interested in stitch pattern than color pattern this year, and this is what I came up with:

(Click the picture for a bigger version, as always.) I worked the cardigan in one piece up to the armpits, then worked the front right, front left, and back seperately. The sleeves were last. By the time I had just a couple inches left to go on the second sleeve, I finally understood why everyone has an aunt who makes one sleeve longer than the other. More on this later.

This sweater has one little daisy embroidered on the left chest. When I was first thinking of the pattern, I thought about embroidering daisies in random diamonds all over the sweater, but by the time it was nearing completion, I realized that the lattice-work pattern made it busy enough that all those daisies would just overwhelm it. I think the one daisy turned out nicely though.

My daisy inspiration came from these silver clasps that I found on the internet. They look so classy and I like them a lot more than I would have liked buttons on this sweater. I bought five clasps, and my mom helped me figure out how many would actually work best. We tried two, three, four, and all five, and we just liked the four best. Who knows if they'll be clasped much anyway.

I found two little white t-shirts (one short sleeved and one long sleeved) to go under the sweater and little iron-on daisies to match. Hopefully all of these elements will go together in both fit and style, and not just on the hanger and in my brain.

The last, and maybe one of my favorite things about the whole ensemble, is the jeans. My friend Leslie took me shopping at the Gap Outlet in Northern Kentucky back in June and I found these really cute jeans. Most of the kids' jeans there were missing their buttons or snaps in front, and that was pretty discouraging. These jeans had a little pink ribbon bow in place of a button and fly, with just enough elastic in back to make them work. So I took the jeans home, and just before I sent them to Washington, I replaced the pink ribbon bow with a thistle ribbon bow, and I was pretty proud of myself. I thought it turned out really cute. My only fear is that the jeans are too long for Maggie.

As for the sleeves... everyone has either had an aunt or a grandma who makes them a sweater with one sleeve longer than the other. And if you didn't have that aunt or grandma, then you know someone who did, or you've heard the joke somewhere. I've discovered why. By the time you get to the end of the second sleeve, you just want the sweater to be finished. No wonder I haven't made adult-sized sweaters. The sleeves would kill me!

I thought I had these sleeves licked. I knitted them in the round (after plotting a careful graph for the stitch pattern and increases), knowing that the under-arm sleeve seam is the absolute worst to sew. But even though I knitted on exactly the same size needles and exactly the same number of rows/diamonds/stitches, one sleeve STILL ended up being a little longer than the other. Then after I washed the sweater, the length issue became even more prominent. I'm hoping no one in Washington will notice (don't read this part, Marysville-ites!), and after I threw the sweater in the dryer it didn't seem quite as bad. I think that next time I make sleeves I'll try the two-sleeves-at-a-time-on-two-circular-needles technique.

Fortunately, my next birthday sweater isn't due until the end of November, when Calvin gets his second first birthday sweater. (He got his first one back in June because of size issues. I'm afraid he won't fit in it once it gets cold, and that's why he gets a second one. Sometimes the youngest needs to be spoiled, too, right?)

You Must Be Kidding

Seriously. All that fuss yesterday and still I forgot a pair. Well, a SWP anyway. The most important SWP according to at least one person. Sorry about that.

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I just finished applying to my dream job. I put it off for about a week (but the position is still open, don't worry). I'm not telling anyone what job it is, but it's my dream job. All my needles are crossed.

Also in job news, the temp agency called today (two days after I re-registered, why did I wait so long?) and might have something for me. This is Very Good News(TM).

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Lastly, I've been tagged. You know those emails that get passed around asking how many kitties you have and what's your favorite flavor of ice cream and how many pair of novelty socks you have in your sock drawer? I don't typically answer them. However, Joy publicly tagged me... the least I can do is respond, right? So here goes:

5 Things in my Freezer
1. half a loaf of mom's homemade bread
2. one Totino's cardboard pizza: combination style
3. innovative, Spanish-speaking popsicles
4. two packages of frozen chicken breasts
5. cat hair

5 Things in my Closet
1. skeletons!
2. suitcases
3. wrapping paper and gift boxes
4. Chuck Taylors
5. cat hair

5 Things in my Car
1. it's not a car, it's a truck
2. music CDs in a Victoria's Secret bag
3. old library books on tape
4. a little rubber dinosaur from Wendy
5. cat hair

5 Things in my Purse
1. a keychain monkey
2. a new tube of Burt's Bees lip gloss
3. a Graeter's gift card
4. my digital camera
5. cat hair

5 Things in my Diaper Bag
1. it's a nappy bag, not a diaper bag
2. i actually have two of them, but no kids
3. i made both of them myself
4. both nappy bags are folded inside a third bag
5. cat hair

I'm gonna continue the tag, but if you don't wanna, you don't hafta.
It's all you: Morgan, Kimmie, Trek, and Leone

Oh, The Shame!

In order to thank you for your patience between posts, I present to you a game. It's just like in the Sunday funny papers. All you have to do is spot the differences between the following two pictures:

Did you find all of the differences?

A funny thing happens when you don't keep a close eye on your yarn... it starts forming support groups. That group in the top picture has started meeting every other Tuesday morning for coffee in the smaller white wicker basket for SWP, "Socks Without Partners". They get all hush hush whenever I come near. I can only imagine what they are saying.

Occasionally they share their leftover donuts.

The Yarn Harlot has the audacity to joke about such a thing. SSS, or Second Sock Syndrome, happens often. The first sock is finished, and the pattern has lost the allure to the knitter, and therefore the second sock is put off indefinitely. At least I've started the mate for each pair, but I still think something that causes single socks to start support groups should be taken more seriously.

Then there's this group:



Bonus points if you can tell me why I can never find any sock needles when I need them.

(Are you kidding me? Why in this world would I need sock needles? Do I not have enough socks to keep me entertained? What is my problem?)

This is not the way a sock instructor and sock club president should act. Where is the love for the socks? You'd think I could finish a pair now and then. Those red, white and blue socks were started LAST YEAR, for pete's sake. It's not like the second one is ridiculously far from being finished. And that teal, green and white pair don't need that much help, either.

Sock knitters, stay away from me. I hope this isn't contagious, but I want you to stay safe.

Crohn's Medicine

It's been a while since I've posted memories of my dad, and since I've had a number of them recently, I thought I'd give them their own post.

One of the ailments my dad suffered from was Crohn's Disease. (Don't click the link if it's lunchtime.) He once read an article about a guy who claimed eating two coconut macaroons a day helped his Crohn's. My dad, being the logical guy that he was, concluded that if coconut macaroons helped, then surely Mounds candy bars would do the same. Often after church, when stopping to pick up a newspaper, he'd grab a Mounds bar or two, claiming he needed to keep up with his Crohn's medicine. Lucky for Mom and I, he'd regularly share, being concerned for our preventative care.

Tonight I was in desperate need of some chocolate, and a package of miniature Mounds bars called out to me. I guess I just needed some Crohn's medicine.

I found a short article online that addresses this coconut theory. My favorite paragraph reads:

At the current time, the theory of coconut macaroons helping Crohn's disease is just a theory. It is what I call a "well, why not" theory. This means, if you have Crohn's disease, you are allowed to try regular food and you like macaroons, why not eat two. If it helps, good for you. Just don't announce you have found the cure, as some individuals may abandon necessary medications for a cookie.

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I'm a total sucker for product placement. Once, when Brenda and I were watching TV together, a commercial came on for Fruity Pebbles, and we couldn't rest until we had some.

Recently there's been a commercial on TV for a Lifetime Original Movie, and for about two seconds during the commercial, it shows a lady drinking a bloody mary. Ever since the first time I saw the commercial, I've been craving tomato juice. I don't want or need the vodka, just the tomato juice.

My dad loved tomato juice. He'd drink it straight, or have Mom heat it up and mix it with some cooked pasta. It was almost as regular of a staple around the house as peanut butter. Isn't it funny how something as simple as tomato juice reminds me of my dad?

Anyway, I picked some up at the store during my chocolate run. It should be cold by now.

(I also bought some grapefruit juice. My mom always bought the kind with Donald Duck on the can, but I couldn't find that kind at the store. I probably wouldn't ever have tried grapefruit juice if it wasn't for my dad, either.)

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I don't know if it's my ears or if it's my TV, but something's been going crazy lately. I keep turning my TV volume up and up so I can hear the stupid thing. And then, as you well know, during the commercials it's about six times louder, so I have to turn it down again. Sometimes it amazes me how loud I actually have it.

When I was a kid, some kids on the street next to ours introduced my brother and me to an older lady named Mrs. Ford on their street. She was an extremely interesting woman with a jungle in her living room and a number of amazing stories to tell.

I remember very distinctly sitting in the family room of our house watching TV with my brother one night when Dad walked in and yelled for us to turn the TV down. "Mrs. Ford doesn't need to hear it!" was one of the phrases he used. Every time I turn my TV down lately, I hear those words. It's kind of funny, now.